Aaron: All right. Welcome to the Truly Amazing Life Show. I am Aaron Kennard, your host. And I have got with me today, a special guest, Patrina Wisdom. How are you doing today Patrina?
Patrina: I am doing fantastic.
Aaron: Awesome. Thank you so much for being on the call. And everybody, a quick intro for Patrina. Patrina is the fresh start specialist. She is a certified life success coach, a speaker, a blogger and she is an author and she is committed to helping others awaken to a life of passion and purpose. I am really excited to have her here. We met about a year ago and I was just intrigued by everything she has got going on and just her desire to really help transform people. We really share that passion so it is really cool to get her on the line today to be able to discuss the principles of living a truly amazing life. That is the whole point behind the show is to just find those people who are absolutely thrilled with life and just figure out what is going on behind the scenes, in their mind, what is making life so amazing for them so with that welcome, Patrina.
Patrina: Yes. Thank you. A pleasure to be here.
Aaron: Yeah, absolutely. It is so good to have you. What I want to start with is just what makes life amazing to you? Why do you wake up every day thrilled to be alive Patrina? And before you actually, I just thought of one more thing I wanted to intro people so, Patrina is a single mother of four. She has got kids from between four to eighteen years old and she is just a woman on a mission. She speaks, she coaches, she does a lot of really amazing things and she is super, I mean, she is just a happy person from every time I have interacted with her. And so, I wanted to give people a little bit more background on you so with that, tell us now, what makes life truly amazing to you?
Patrina: You know what? I really feel like I was born happy.
Aaron: That is convenient.
Patrina: I do not ever really remember a time in my life where I went through periods of depression or anything like that. I literally had been born happy and I have been through incredible challenges and ups and downs in my life and somehow, managed to really maintain my peace and my happiness. And I know that consciously, as I have grown older, I remember at a certain age making a decision at the very early age, just looking at the people around me and how miserable they were that I was not going to be like that. So a lot of my trauma, a lot of my challenges, the things that I have gone through started at three years old. I was molested at three years old, it was violence in my home, it was sexual beatings around me all the time. Just single mother household off of my [inaudible], the women of my family were all single mothers, unmarried, just incredible challenges. It is all sorts of [inaudible] going on around me and I just remember at a very, very young age saying, hey, that is not going to be me. I am not going to be jaded, I am not going to be grumpy, I am not going to lash out on people and I really feel like I am taking all that with me just from three years old and done whatever I had to do in order to maintain my peace and my joy.
Aaron: Wow. That sounds like a pretty intense upbringing but, and I want to get into it a little bit more of that so I can see how that could be the case like, if you have made that commitment that that could have turned into a big blessing for you to have pushed you. I mean, it is like either going to push you one way or the other and it seems like a lot of people in that circumstance would just get dragged into the misery with that. Did you see the…
Patrina: Exactly. Exactly. I mean, I grew up in a family that was very loving. Do not get me wrong. I mean, we had a lot of love in our family and we had a lot of dysfunctions and we had a lot of hypocrisy. So I was thought the basic principles of loving each other and treating people as you want them treated and all of that stuff. And my family was heavily religious, heavily committed to being in the Church, having [inaudible] where you sleep overnight at the Church and fasting and praying all the time and the prayer meetings and then this and that. And they have all of this other craziness going on in their lives and I was seeing both sides of that. So very confusing at a young age and we make a lot of decisions about ourselves very early on based on what is going on around us and I just, I do not know, I just remember isolating very early and just saying, maybe not decisions like I said, that I do not want to be like that. Even though I was not exactly sure what I did want to be like. Does that make sense to you?
Aaron: Yeah, yeah. So it is the unhappiness, the misery, the hypocrisy. Seeing people teaching and doing the exact opposite and all of the sadness that led to really probably, right?
Patrina: Yeah, and what I found myself doing like, when I was younger, I used to actually play in my closet, I put all my toys in my closet and I was playing there so that hopefully no one would find me or talk to me or anything. I just created this really beautiful world for myself so I can make peace and my happiness. I just always have that zest that I need to do something better and I knew there was something better and I knew there has to have been another way to live life. And so as I grew up, and right around the age of 11-12 years old, right before my teen year. I actually discovered personal development very, very early. I saw the [inaudible] book, you can see in your life that I was attracted to the colors and the format of the book. And from that moment on, I was like, a whole new world opened up to me, you know.
Aaron: So you just saw that randomly at a book store or something?
Patrina: Yeah. I used to love, I have had two crazy obsessions. One of them was, when [inaudible] came out, like I would literally spend hours and hours at [inaudible]. I was so fascinated with [inaudible]. I know it is 24 hours, there was like an [inaudible] for me, right? And then, book stores. I love the way books now, I am always in there. It was so nicely decorated. You know, you can find joy in anything, the little things. And so I spend a lot of time in book stores and whether I had the money to buy books or not, I would just sit there and put through stuff and so yeah, I just discovered, you can heal your life by [inaudible] very early on and really got into the context then I found, was it Marianne Williamson?
Aaron: Yeah. Marianne Williamson.
Patrina: Williamson, right?
Aaron: Yeah, yeah.
Patrina: And I just went on from there. I became obsessed with personal development and just kind of finding my own way. So then, moving through my life. I have these new principles. It was like taking the stuff that was put into me as a foundation with the religion. But then having these other options available to me, more flexibility. Something unique and authentic who I felt like I was. And I started to like craft and shape who I wanted to be, right? So I think at a very, very early age I knew I had choice. And I believe that is actually powerful because a lot of people grow up believing that they are a victim. And I have never ever, ever accepted that I am a victim.
Aaron: Wow. How did you come to that? That knowledge of your choice?
Patrina: I just have always chosen differently. I guess maybe when I was younger, it was called rebellion, right? And it is really funny because I took on the role of the good girl at a very young age. I always did what people told me to do. I followed the rules, I stayed out of trouble, I kept my nose clean. However, I also was very opinionated at the same time. I may not have always spoken it because I lost my voice at a very young age or I learned that if I just do not say anything, I just fly under the radar that my life is going to be a lot smoother than if I speak up. But that did not stop me from having my own ideas about how things should be. So the older that I got and the more that I grew into myself, I started playing with, you know, kind of speaking up for myself, doing things a little bit differently and I actually moved out of my house. I met the love of my life at 15 years old. So I met him, I knew immediately we were going to be married and we ended up living together when I was 16. I was already paying bills at my house and if I figured, if I am paying bills, I am taking care of myself, then I do not need to be here, right? It is time for me to fly. And so I did.
Aaron: So you have been independent since just, sounds like you were ready to leave the roost early years before that.
Patrina: Oh yeah. If I could have left earlier, I probably would have. Like I literally started working, job at 13 years old lying about my age. I was tall, very mature so people did not realize how old I was and I was just always longing for control in my life.
Aaron: How old were you when you’re, I mean, you have siblings? Were you younger or older?
Patrina: I don’t. I am an only child.
Patrina: And I was raised with cousins and things like that. Other family members, other children around me but yeah, only child, so, yeah, so.
Aaron: So yeah, you found that independence pretty early. You moved out and then kind of what happened from there?
Patrina: Well, like I said, we met at 15 by 16 years old. We had an apartment together, he was in college and I was in high school, I thought it was a little bit of an age gap but funny enough, we were married and in love for over 20 years. So if you fast forward, yeah, can you believe it? If you fast forward to 2009, we had been married now, at that point, we had been married a little over 12 years, were together for about 21-22 years. And we had two children. I was a stay at home mom. We had built a financial business together, had experienced a tremendous amount of success, travel, we were the leaders of the community. We had created this beautiful life that I have always envisioned myself having. And I was probably the happiest that had ever been in my entire life. And then on January 6th of 2009, my husband got up, [inaudible] as he usually did. [inaudible] suit and tie, his briefcase and he kissed us all good bye and walked out of the door knowing he was never coming home again. Yeah, yeah. So after him being missing for 24 hours, and I am calling in and I am checking him and I do not know what is going on but we all have that intuition that tells us that something is not right. I found out that my husband had committed suicide.
Aaron: Oh, wow.
Patrina: So again, I have been through tremendous challenges throughout my entire life. I discovered personal development at an early age, I have gone through this whole journey of self-discovery. I was very whole, I was very complete, I was very happy, I had a life. And then I get completely blind sided with my husband’s suicide.
Aaron: So you did not see it coming at all. He did not seem depressed or anything?
Patrina: No. He was a functional depressed person. If that is the thing.
Aaron: So internally, he never talked about it. He was depressed but he just kind of put on the face that everything was fine.
Patrina: He was never diagnosed and what I realized is that he was wearing the mask like a lot of us do, right? We just kind of suck it up and keep moving. That is how we are trained to be. We had a very A type perfectionist success oriented family. We are a go, go, go, push, push, push. Sleep when you die, failure is not an option. That was the culture we had created in our home. And so, he would go through periods where he was feeling down. We would talk about it, we get through it, every single year. And it was usually around not achieving certain goals then. And like I said, I have always been an optimist. I have always have this incredible passion for being happy and so for me, just a thought of depression is like, what is that? What is that? Really? Let us talk about it and keep moving. So the same day I found out that my husband had committed suicide, what I also found that same day is I was pregnant with my fourth child.
Patrina: So yeah. And that time I was a mother of three.
Aaron: That is a lot to take in in one day.
Aaron: That is a lot to take in in one day. That is kind of crazy.
Patrina: It really is but I mean, if you look at it, my whole life had already been a training ground for how to be in trauma and challenges swiftly and smoothly.
Aaron: Yeah, wow.
Patrina: So yeah, here I am, a single mom of soon to be four children, completely blind-sided by my husband’s suicide and then that moment, all of the issues, the worthiness, the abandonment issues, everything I had already worked through in my life started to bubble up. Yeah, started to bubble up. It came back to haunt me and I now had to figure out how I was to recreate my life for myself and my children. And that is how I got the name “The Fresh Start Specialist”. Patrina Wisdom, “The Fresh Start Specialist” because what I do now is through this tragedy, I actually found my purpose. Before my husband passed, I was a performer, I was a singer, song writer. And that is what I did when I was supporting him in our financial business. But now it is like, I did not have the luxury, I did not have the container of my husband there to protect me, I did not have the love and the support that I was used to. I just had to figure out how to move forward.
Aaron: You have said throughout your whole life, obviously there had to have been some kind of transition period here. I mean of morning, whatever. What was that really? What was that like? What was that time period like in relation to your happiness, your feeling about, everything like that?
Patrina: Well I think what have boiled down to is that, I have never really given myself permission to be unhappy. Does that make sense?
Aaron: I think so. Tell me more about that.
Patrina: Yeah, I mean, I have made a decision, the commitment if you will, at a very young age that I was not going to be what I was seeing around me. And so, I think I went through my entire life not giving myself permission to be unhappy which, one thing I am to be looked at as a negative, but the other him, I truly believe that it is what kept me through 40 years of incredible highs and incredible lows. It is not an option for me. Failure is not an option, sadness, depression, suicide. None of that is not an option for me. And so, especially now I am looking at the three children that I already have that I am responsible for and I have a new life inside of me. So from the day I found out about my husband’s suicide, I never get a B. I knew immediately that there had to have been a purpose for me in my life. This was something that had to happen in order to push me into my purpose. And I will be honest, I was hiding. I would shrink and dim my life in order for other people feel comfortable and I was always the first one to support and push someone else up and I was very comfy and cozy and safe playing the more submissive, supportive role.
Aaron: So you are saying, the day he died, you felt and knew that this was happening on purpose to push you in some good direction.
Patrina: Yes. So even though I did not completely buy into religion, specifically the religion that I grew up in, I was always very spiritual. So I have always had a very intimate relationship spirit. I do not have a name that I place on it, I do not have, just the container is what I have trouble with. The container that people put spirit in. I think that was why I was literally attracted to personal development because it kind of opened everything up for me. So it has always been very strong presence within me. My relationship with spirit have always, go ahead.
Aaron: Tell me, yeah, I would love sharing that. Tell me more about that thought process, what gave you that ability to immediately right when that was happening, feel and know, I mean, you speak of it as if you knew. There was not like this question, you knew that this was happening for your good somehow.
Patrina: Yes. And the reason I say that is because if there was anything in this entire world that could break me, that was it. That was it. He was this man with my life. My mother would get angry at me because she said I treated him like a God. He was everything to me. He was the love of my life. He was my best friend. He was the father of my children. He was the person, the only person, aside from my mom and 13 people in my family that I felt completely protected, loved, accepted, unjudged. He was that person to me. So if there was anything in this entire world that could have completely broken me, that would have been it. It was him. And so, in the moment the he passed and being that I had all these pieces to put [inaudible] together and I have these kids that were reflections of him and me. Again, I just, I do not know, I do not even know how to explain it. I just knew. I was like, okay, obviously, I am being pushed to do something bigger. I have a bigger, greater purpose here on Earth, something else that I am supposed to be doing. Yeah. I do not know. Sorry, I got [inaudible]
Aaron: No. I love that so I am trying to get into more detail. What is really going on in your heart? What gives that? I just heard this statement from somebody recently who is an Atheist. She does not believe in God, she was telling me, well, that is fine, that story, you had this big tremendous loss of the disease and that was hard but you never lost your spouse. So if you lost your spouse, you would been able to believe in God. And she literally told me that and I was like, I felt sad and for that viewpoint because I certainly, truly hope and pray I do not ever have to experience what you just experienced but what you had said is that you believed in something good, whatever you have called, you believed in purpose and something higher and something happening for your good in in spite the worst possible thing that could have ever possibly happen to you and just to lose the love of your life. So it is really touching me right now to hear this because of that recent experience of me thinking through what this person had just told me. So that is why I am a bit curious, what gave you that? That was, I mean, our companionship, our personal relationship with our spouse or the significant other that is the most important relationship to any of us on the Earth. And so, to lose that is one of the hardest thing. And so how? Yeah. That is why I am really interested, tell me more about what you have been through.
Patrina: So, I have never. Yeah, I have never really given it a lot of thought but now that you have posed the question, I think that my husband in a sense was my savior on my life, right. So if he was my savior and now he has been taken away, what is next? And I was like questioning myself, okay, so what is next? And I have always believed that everything happens for a reason. And that was he glued in me from a very young age. Everything happens for a reason. So rather than questioning why it happened, I ask myself questions like, okay, what is next? What am I meant to learn? And it is funny because later in life, I got certified as a neural linguistic therapist and realized that I’m part of neural linguistic therapy, right? Asking better questions.
Aaron: Yeah. It is huge. That that thing right there, just asking, not asking why, so many of us get trapped in this “why me?” This victim thing, right? It is all based in that victim but you never allowed yourself to be a victim.
Patrina: I never accepted that. Yeah, I never looked at myself because I can choose to.
Aaron: So you have probably never asked why me and none any hard thing? That is probably just not you habit of acting when hard things happen, right?
Patrina: No. It is not my natural instinct but I will tell you of how 2 years after my husband passed, when I finally got getting settled, but it was still challenging, then I had moments where I when I went into why the hell did this happen? Why me? What did we do, right?
Aaron: So initial, you took what you had and your reserves of this faith and what not. You took that and you carried those 2 years and then there came a point where in it felt like it was too oppressive?
Patrina: Yeah. I have a crazy ability to displace emotion. Like step out of the situation when it is really important to be able to step out of it and make logical decisions or decisions that are going to be for the well-being of the whole. And then later, once the fire is out, then I can step back into it and deal with the emotional part. But I literally checked out emotionally for about a year and a half after my husband passed away and I was just a robot doing what I had to do in order for everything to be okay.
Aaron: That is like the survival instinct, the mother’s survival instinct. Yeah, I saw the same thing with my wife when I was sick and I was, she just totally stepped up and hold everything together. She just handled everything graciously, it was like, and then, as soon as I was recovered and she could let down her guard, she was like the emotional oppression just kind of bombarded her. It is really interesting how that works. So that is what was going on with you. So take me through that one then, what did you do? How did you deal with that?
Patrina: So yeah, I was about, like I said, I was fighting every member. So [inaudible] again, I made a decision that I cannot fall apart until this baby comes out of my body because everything that I am going to feel is going to be transferred into this child. I did not want to birth a stressed baby or depressed baby. So I put all the emotions on the shelf and I just kept moving. So when he was born in August of 2009, it was about two months after he was born that I decided I was going to take a retreat, that I was just going to leave for a week and just really fall into my emotions and allow myself to just go there and start feeling with the grief. And I was breast feeding so I had to take the baby with me. And I brought out an [inaudible] this is what I really went back into that space of where I was at 11 years old. Then it is like, okay, what is next? In going back into that journey and self-discovery, me putting the pieces together with who I am because it is like, who I am now if he is not here? I knew who I was at 11-12 years old or up to 15 before we met but then we became one for over 20 years. So now, I have to separate myself from this energy that has [inaudible] a part of me. All the ideas, all the dreams, all the goals were combined. And so, I had to sit down and figure out, separate out what would be, what was him and who am I now. And that is actually how I developed my process that I use in my coaching now which I call my six step wisdom process and basically what that is is, the first step, who am I? So with that, I did a lot of work on self-esteem, my true self, what my beliefs are and giving myself permission to step back fully and into who I am authentically. Step two is identify and with that, I sat down, I did a time to timeline and really got to the root of the different block and values I had and why I had these values but also the why that consumes me to move forward no matter what the heck hit me in the head.
Aaron: Interesting. So you look into the past and made decisions about why you were doing what you were choosing to do?
Patrina: Exactly. So I take her a glimpse into the past so I can decide in the present how I want to create the future.
Aaron: Interesting. That is cool. You tell me the others. Yeah, keep going.
Patrina: For step three, is sacred self-care which is what I did in what was in October of 2009 when I lived by it, okay, stop. I have done everything I had to do up until this point to get everything back stable. Now, let me take the time for myself. Rebuild me so that I can offer more for my children and to the world, right? And just focus. So basic self-care is all about treating yourself like a God, right? Taking care of yourself as you would God. Eating, sleeping, boundaries, rituals, just really being clear on who you are and taking care of yourself so that you have more to offer. So I was saying, keeping your cup full, right? And over flowing and then serving from the overflow because by October of 2009, I was completely depleted. I was done, I have nothing left to give, all right? So at that point, I was forced to surrender but my [inaudible] sacred care in our life as just a ritual, as a practice for us incorporating that, then we never get to the point of depletion.
Aaron: I love it. I love how you treat that. I mean, I love how you say that sacred self-care and treating yourself sacredly as treating yourself with that divinity of who you truly are. That is powerful.
Patrina: Yeah because by October, I was literally having breakdowns. I have taken over the financial business, I was having breakdowns in the bathroom. One minute I would be motivating and leading a team of a hundred financially then I was in the bathroom crawled up in the toilet and crying and purging and shaking because I was falling apart. Like I had no energy, I was emotionally done. And so, this is where this whole concept of sacred self-care came from. Going on those retreat, spending seven days taking care of me and how I felt when I came back and knowing that I was strong enough to keep moving forward and reconnecting with that joy, that happiness that I have always had. So then, step four in rebuilding is the clear. And this is really having a clear vision of what I want to create next and what my mission, my purpose and my vision for my life is so that I can start to map out how am I going to get there. Step five is organizing. Organize, scheduling, having a strategic plan and then calling in what it is that I want rather than focusing on the things that I do not want. Yeah. So I always say that a lot of us in our lives, we are so busy reacting in our lives instead of creating. And so I felt people stop moving by default and get back to the driver seat of your life which is essentially what I did when I was starting to recreate. It is like, okay, these are the things that are happening to me right now. We always have choice, so I can go this way or I can go that way. I always chose to go the way that I knew that was going to lead me in the direction of the reality that I want to create for myself.
Aaron: Yeah, that is powerful. So it is organize. That is the [inaudible]
Patrina: Yeah. I have this gift where I am an artist but I am also very analytical, right? So it is great because I can be in the fantasy world and in the dream world and create all these beautiful vision but then, I can also back engineer and figure out how to get myself there.
Aaron: That is an important, that is cool. It is a valuable gift to have.
Patrina: It comes I handy with my coaching.
Aaron: Yeah, exactly. I mean there are a lot of us that were really artistic but there is definitely a balance. Some people heavily weighted analytical, some people super heavy on the art side. Sounds like you’ve kind of got the mix of both.
Patrina: Yeah. It is a beautiful gift and that is one of the gifts I discovered when I was working on really discovering who I am. And I literally sat down and made a list of all of my gifts and my talents and what people come to me for and the things that make me perfectful in my life. And a lot of it was, people love to talk to me because they know they can trust me and I am a good problem solver and I am very systematic. Yeah. So for me, what comes really easy then became this coaching business, right? And then my story, and all my experiences and what led me to speaking. These people were like, oh my God, people need to hear your story. I am like, okay.
Aaron: Yeah. Well, and what you’re taking us to and it is just, I am sure there is so much more to this period that would be so powerful to hear that we do not have to time to get into but I am just thinking through this experience of having your husband died like, shutting down a business and your children and I am putting myself in my wife’s shoes if I were to happen like in our situation then, man, that is I had to had been just such a growing, trying, I mean, you have probably just scratched the surface of that here, I am guessing.
Patrina: Oh, it is. Yeah. I mean, it is an ongoing conversation. There is so much that was learned.
Aaron: You are still in it. You are having, yeah.
Patrina: Yeah. Every day is a journey. Honestly, everything is expanding and growing and I made more sense in what happened five years ago in things that happen today. And so you just got a better understanding of how your wife felt when you were in your disease, or, I am sorry, your physical [inaudible]
Aaron: Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Patrina: Just like you got a better understanding of her position in that, I get a better understanding every single day of what my husband was going through. And that is really the foundation for what I do in my coaching. And also, I have a non-profit organization for [inaudible] protection and awareness. And so, the feedback, the more I learn about what he was going through, more than I really pay attention and stay connected to my journey, then the more I had to offer to people in both sides of my business.
Aaron: Yeah. This is powerful. What was the sixth last step? By the way, that really is powerful after organize in your system there?
Patrina: Yeah, thank you. Yeah, the last one is M, it is move. It is showing us. Now that you have done all of the work to really reconnect with who you are, what it is that you want asking other people’s expectations. We will be learning how to take care of yourselves. To clearing what you want and just having a clear vision of what you want to create in your life and putting it into a plan. The last step is actually, to do it. Show us as your authentic self the exact commitment to show us as your authentic self and to get into action, creating this life. Because a lot of us have all the information but we do not integrate it and we do not act on it. So the last step is move. And that is obviously engaging the community, the support that you need, the coaches that you need, the spiritual leaders that you need in your life who will support you in where you are going instead of where you are right now. It is easy to find people who will support you in your sickness, right?
Aaron: Yeah. But they can believe in you? Can you go to the heights of you were meant to go, right?
Patrina: Yeah. Well, I think our default is to nurture the victim, right? So when things happen and people are like, oh, I am so sorry. I know how you feel. And then, they want to talk about their story and just fell deeper and deeper into the darkness rather than just holding space for that person so that they can release what it is that they are going through and then, once they are done with their releasing, okay, so now, how can I support you in moving forward? If more people were focused on what is next, in the end you would not have so many people sitting in victim [inaudible].
Aaron: Yeah, for sure. I did not notice as you were going through those that I was, the acronym for wisdom like now, you have mentioned that but those six steps, I guess that spells out that is your name, right?
Patrina: Exactly, exactly. It was, who am I? Identify, sacred self-care, declare, organize and move.
Aaron: I love that. I love having simple systems. I love how you systematized that to remind yourself of those processes to be able to teach others. It is so much easier for us to learn when we have a framework to learn within. So it is just organized in our minds and it is really powerful to do that like what you have done there.
Patrina: Exactly. And the power of the program as well. The system is that it is something that when someone works with me and I take them through those six tests, then they have that. Those are tools that they get to keep and continue flowing in and out of long after we stopped working together and that is what I tell to my clients. I am like, this is not like, I am not holding you up. I am giving you tools and then I am here to support you. And when you are ready to fly, you still have the tools and sometimes you will regret a little bit and you will be able to like, oh my God, what is going on with me and you can look at those success and go, oh, that is it. I am not taking care of myself. I am just tired, I am depleted which is just making me grouchy and I am not happy with it right now so I am lashing out at my kids or try whatever it is. You can try and look at those success and see where you are. If you are in a relationship that is not serving you and you are wondering, why am I putting up with this? Right? Take a look at those six steps and then you go, oh, I need to revisit step one. Go back and really look at myself esteem. Something is lacking here right now. What is this triggering for me?
Aaron: Yes. It is really powerful to have those things and to give yourself that foundation, you can always come back to remind yourself, oh, it is like a check listing.
Patrina: The sacred self-care [inaudible] I guess.
Aaron: Yes. That is awesome. I love it and I also love how in line it is with what I teach and it is the 12 Pillars of a truly amazing life which is the framework that came out of my story and a lot of those things that you are saying, they are just so in line with like, one of the pillars which I teach is remember who you are. And that is like your number one thing, who am I? That is such an important, such a foundational principle, but just having this your framework or any framework that has truth built into it that we can go back to and remind ourselves, allows us to take when we get through those hard times or those times that were down. We can go to the framework and then, okay, just check off the list. Am I doing this, this? And it helps just get out of our heads and back into the freedom of being able to create again rather.
Patrina: Exactly. Back into creation. And if we do not know who we are, how do we teach other people who we are? If we do not love ourselves, how do we teach other people how to love us, right? If we do not know what we want, how to expect to get it? It is very simple.
Aaron: Yeah. Totally. I mean, we have to start with ourselves for sure and I mean, I love that overflowing cup thing you talked about in the beginning. You really cannot give love if there is not love inside of us to give, if we do not love ourselves, we do not have, it is just, it is not happening.
Patrina: Someone asked me in the podcast the other day, they said, you know, Patrina, you always look at life with a glass half full instead of the glass half empty. No, I said, I am sorry. I have to correct you. My cup is always full or overflowing. It is never half full or half empty, right?
Aaron: Yeah, exactly, exactly.
Patrina: So if you really think about that and you keep yourself full, you do not have over flow, do not thirst.
Aaron: Yeah. Because you are not really, it is like, sometimes you do what you got to do like in the survival mode with when you had to do that, you basically drained your cup for a while but it comes to an end. You cannot keep going like that and it is not healthy and it is like, it is more, I `mean, probably you could not have done it, maybe would not be able to do anything different at that time because you really needed to get in the survival mode and at the same time, as soon as you can, we need to get back into filling that cup up so we can keep living, keep growing, right?
Patrina: Yeah and in [inaudible] of my system with sacred self-care. I teach people the little ways but because I did do it throughout those first year and a half, it was just was not smaller increment, the little things that kept me sane, the little things that as simple as coming home and lighting an incense and having a hot couple baths before my kids go to bed. Like little things that you do just to kind of just refuel even a little bit…
Aaron: Which is what kept you going on a day to day basis and then at some point you needed to have a major recharge.
Patrina: Exactly. So we need to have intentional moment or time to set aside schedule in our lives every single day where we are taking care of ourselves, giving back to ourselves. Because if we are not healthy, if we are not energetic, if we are not positive and happy, then we are not offering that into the world. We are not helping anyone.
Aaron: That is awesome. I would love hearing your story and we are wrapping up at the end of our time here so, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and your insights and your story and why don’t we wrap up if you can just tell us how people can get in touch with you, I believe it is patrinawisdom.com. Is there any other things before we wrap up?
Patrina: Yes. You can visit me at patrinawisdom.com. You can also email me like I love to interact with people so either on social media at patrinawisdom, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, all of them. Or you could email me directly coach@patrinawisdom. And I do a wisdom Wednesday video. So if you sign up for my mailing list on my website, you will actually hear from me every week on Wednesday and I give three tips to awakening something. This week it is awakening consciousness. So yeah, let us keep in touch and I would like to offer your listeners a free copy of my awakening life audio CD and that is a 15 minute audio that would walk you through awakening self-esteem, true self and creativity. It is pretty profound and has some exercises on there that can get you started on your journey.
Aaron: How can they? So they just go to your website to get that?
Patrina: Yeah. They can go to my website and subscribe or they can shoot me an email and I will send them a link either way. If the do go to my website though, have them put in AK after their last name. So that I know they came from you.
Aaron: So like when you are saying, when they subscribe. I got you, they just put their name in the subscription thing and write AK.
Patrina: So Patrina Wisdom AK.
Aaron: Got you.
Patrina: Or Tom, Sally AK.
Aaron: Okay. Got you. Yeah. So go ahead and do that everybody if you want to get, to get more information, insights from Patrina. Feel free to head over to her website. I will put the links to this on our website as well, all the contact information will be on trulyamazinglife.com/podcast and you can look at the archives there and get links over to Patrina site and learn more about her and her story and how she can help you and guide you through awakening your own life. Patrina, can you leave us with one final thought of how people could in your take, what action today to make their life truly amazing?
Patrina: Yes. And you know what that would be? It would be as a song, if that is okay.
Aaron: Yes. Please. I love it.
Patrina: Young girl, don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl, it's all right
Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly
When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means
When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within
And that’s for girls in guys.
Aaron: That is fantastic. The main message there was trust your voice within huh.
Patrina: Exactly. That song got me through my tragedy because it just brought me back to the fact that everything I need is within me and I am the one that I need to learn how to depend on. So reconnecting with yourself is always the answer.
Aaron: That is fantastic. Thank you for sharing your music, your life, your love, your enjoyment of life and your passion for life with us and thanks for ending with that. That was really cool to kind of hear your heart in that and I have always been, music really connects with me to, it is one of those things that hard time that I had so many times the music really brings me out of it and just helps me connect with who I am, so. I think we are on the same page with that.
Patrina: Yeah. Thank you so much for having me. This is amazing. I love what you are doing. And if there is any way I could support you and your journey as well, please, please reach out.
Aaron: Absolutely. All right. Thank you so much and we will let everybody go for now and check you on the next podcast. Thanks for tuning in.