Aaron: All right. Welcome to the show today. I’ve got Dr. Daphne Clarke Hudson on the phone today and I am really excited to have her here. She is on a mission to empower other people and I have seen her getting many accomplishments. Too many to mention here actually today but, she is a host of a cable TV show. She is a host of radio shows. She is currently doing one on one on Blog Talk Radio as well on education and inspiration and empowerment of other entrepreneurs and business people. She has been in the business in life of empowering people for many, many years now. And so, I am just really excited to have you on the line. Are you here with me Daphne?
Daphne: Yes. Thank you Aaron for having me. It is really an honor.
Aaron: Yes. The honor is mine. I really appreciate having you here, so. I would like to get people to know you a little bit better but I want to start with one question that I usually start with. That is, Daphne, what is that make life truly amazing to you?
Daphne: My entire journey. As I look back over my humble beginnings back in Jamaica [inaudible] as a girl who lost her mother at the age of 14. Life could have gone many different directions. So when I looked on myself today at the age of 60, 6 years young. Life is amazing because there are many young girls who have had their mothers their entire lives who still have not experienced the life that I am experiencing today. Life is so amazing because it gives me the amazing opportunity to work with people all over the world and to help them tell their stories.
Aaron: That is cool. How did you do that? What are you up to on that regard as far as helping people? Tell the stories.
Daphne: I do this through my coaching practice. I assist individuals to be authentic about who they are. There are many of my clients that I have to work with to reinvent who they are. There are some that before they can reinvent, I have to help them dismantle what has been holding them hostage for different reasons. There are some people who have been held hostage because of money and many other things. And I have to have the thought provoking conversation with them to find out what is more important, making the difference, walking into your true calling or purpose or making the money. And that is a very thought provoking conversation for a lot of people because there are many people Aaron, as I am sure you know yourself, go into businesses for the wrong reasons. We go into business because I think “I can make a lot of money”. My message is to tell them, you go into business because the product or service that you have will allow for the recipient of those services or products to enhance their lives, the lives of your family members, and also to impact the community. And when you approach that, you live a fulfilled, rewarding live and the universe is so generous and faithful that it compensates us once we continue to add value in the world.
Aaron: Absolutely. That is cool. That is fantastic mission to be on and I could see that just based on what you have done in your life that you are definitely about that for quite some time now. How many years has it been since you have been on this mission?
Daphne: Oh my heavens. It is twenty plus years and it is just like yesterday because I have so much thought Aaron. I tell you, I live in the Northeast and come, rain, [inaudible] or snow. I am just excited as it is 120 Degrees because I love what I do so much. Sometimes, I do not see it as business, I do not see it as work because it brings me so much joy and satisfaction. One of my clients wrote me a note the other day and she says, it is a pity you cannot clown yourself because she says that, although, the others cannot be like you but however every person in this world needs to have a coach and a mentor like you because you are so special to me. And I mean, if she had caught me a check for $3 Million, it would not have made the same impact on me as hearing those words from her.
Aaron: Yeah. I can totally relate to that. It is just, yeah, having come to a place of, primarily just working for money to moving into work, doing work that I love and I am passionate about for the sake of making impact in the people’s lives. I can totally on so many levels on that on how fulfilling it is and how much more joy there is in life and we know we are working on purpose rather than for others and so.
Daphne: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. The amazing thing about operating your calling and purpose and just staying focused to that authentic part of you and stay true to that. Every day is rewarding and every day is new excitement. You do not get bored. You do not get bored because there is always somebody new for you to spend time with and to help them to just redesign or restructure or reinvent or transform their lives.
Aaron: Yeah. Well, I can feel just your enthusiasm, the passion for life and it sounds like you have had this, like you said, the last twenty plus years has been so fast the blink of an eye because you have just been so thrilled to be doing it every day, right?
Daphne: A couple of years ago I was speaking to this woman. At the time I think I knew her for over six years. And she said, you know, for warrant of a better world, you makes me sick. And I said, well, why would you say something like that? She said, for all this time I have known you, no matter what you are going through, you have never complained, you have never whined, if your gas tank is on empty, you are happy. If you have a full tank, you are happy. I said to her, sweetheart, every day I wake up and I look through the blinds of the window and I see the rays of the sun. I have nothing not to be happy about because I said, a lot of people did not get that opportunity. And that has been my philosophy Aaron. You are talking to a woman who have encountered many adversities. You are talking to a woman that at one stage was homeless returned a young son and we have transformed our life and turned that around and now, today, I can help others do that, so. It is never your experience. It is always, life is a journey, and it is never destination. It is continue, once you are breathing oxygen, the journey continues.
Daphne: So do not get bugged on and let your past experience who you are because your potential is still ahead of you.
Aaron: Absolutely. That is fantastic. I want to talk about, you have been in this place for so long. I want to talk about, take us back to the beginning. I mean, what brought you to this place of so much confidence, peace, happiness in life and being able to embrace all of your experiences with a smile and with true happiness, just gratitude. I mean, I just feel gratitude overwhelm bubbling over out of you. You are just so grateful to be alive that how could you not bsmiling? So, take us back though in the past with, you mentioned when you were young, your mother died and was there times in your past where you struggled to be happy? Where you have not figured this out yet? You have not felt this gratitude for life?
Daphne: When I was a child, my mother was an asthmatic. My family were farmers. My parents were famers, my father, my mother was a farmer, whoever. Let us say on a Friday, if my mother would have an asthmatic attack, I was not allowed to go to school [inaudible] my father would be on the field working. And I would need to be home with my mother.
Aaron: And you grew up in Jamaica? Is that right?
Daphne: I grew up in Jamaica, West Indies. Without electricity, without running water, without a bathroom. We had what was known as a out-house. All right? And I remember on those days Aaron, when I was home, I could not go to school and yes, I was a bit sad about not going to school. However, as I would hold my mother’s head on my chest because she was having such difficulties breathing. And I would hear my mother say to me, you are going to be a good nurse. Because of the way I was holding her and the attention. And she said, the only difference is going to be is that you are going to be getting paid and wear a uniform. Because back when I was growing up, nurses wore uniforms and a cap and all of that. And that is what my mom told me. So although I was missing school to take care of her. And although I was not privileged to go to a high school as a child, I spent my entire time at an elementary school which allowed to me to take the local exam of the island. And that was how I was able to go to nursing school but I knew then Aaron. There was something inside of me. I was different. I do not know how so. But even when I worked as a nurse, I was doing it differently. I was always talking to people and want to find out more about their lives. And I know they were not just sick people, they were individuals. So before I would administer their medication, I would talk to them to find out what is going on with their lives. When I was off from work or did your family come to visit them. And from those early times going up in the West Indies and although I did not have the amenities that other people had, I knew I was fortunate. I saw so much love in my family. I saw kindness. As I have mentioned about my father and mother being farmers. They also raised animals and one of things that would happen in my district Aaron is that if your family butchered a pig and my family butchered a goat, they would exchange their meats. So in simple mean, every family is blessing the other family with something else. So I grew up all my life being exposed to this abundance out of what people would call poverty. I did not know I was poor Aaron until I came to America and people telling me, oh, you grew up in poverty. I am looking around, I have so much great values inside of me. There is nothing poor about that. And these are still the guidelines that I live by today. Be grateful for what I have. Do not pine about what you could have had but show gratitude for what you have right now.
Aaron: So you are saying, do not pine about what you could have had but be grateful for what you already have. Such a powerful principle and it sounds like you learned that. It is just ingrained in you growing up. Your whole culture was about that it sounds like.
Daphne: Yes. One of the other things we had an experience one here in Connecticut here. We had a blizzard when it was not even time for that and we were out of electricity for a long time and I made a soup of, I had a lot of dried beans and peas and everything. And I made a soup. And my friend looked at me and she said, my God, you could make a go made meal out of a rock. And I laugh and I grew up not realizing I was born and raised on organic foods because majority of the time, unless the family is butchering an animal or something, we always do not have meat so always a lot of vegetables and peas and all of that. And I know that it was always such a blessing to have fresh foods. I realized that a lot of people, simple things Aaron. Like a fruit tree, there are a lot of people in this world that has never seen a fruit on a tree. They go to the supermarket, they see the produce there and select the produce and they take it home. I have the amazing opportunity of harvesting a fruit form a tree from the tree to my mouth. That is a blessing many people do not have and that is just a simple things in life. As soon as I/you realize how blessed you are with what you have, then more is going to be added instead of pining in about, oh, John Brown has this and I do not have that. Bless what you have and watch it multiply.
Aaron: Yes. Very good. That reminds me so much of what my children was recently were kind of pining about how everything is not fair and it is kind of constant with them. They are like, it is not fair, he is getting more of this, he gets more of this than me. And I said, would you pray to God and say, hey, this is not fair, my neighbor has a bigger house thane me. This is not fair that they have more stuff than me. It sounds ridiculous if you put it that way but that is how our children, my children sometimes communicate and I am trying to figure out how to teach them how to be grateful for what they have and stop comparing themselves to everything else around and trying to have what others have. What do you have to say on that?
Daphne: And bless their little hearts Aaron. Children live what they learn and they are not only learning from you, they are going out in society and they are seeing these things, they are hearing it on social media. So my only advice there for you is to keep living authentically because in the long run, you are going to be able to override those other impressions that they are getting from other people. So you engage them in a conversation. Why it is not the proper thing to compare yourself, tell me John, what is special about you? And you keep helping to enhance their authentic self. Help them to tap into their uniqueness. Nobody has your fingers, nobody has your toes. It is those little things that you can hone in and bring back. In this family sweetheart, we have so much love. When mommy is not feeling good, when your brother or your sister is not feeling good, the entire family is sad. Does not that come from something? It is not the material things that we have, but we have each other. And as parents Aaron, we need to listen to our children. We do not listen enough because if we allow them to express themselves, we will see where their little hearts are.
Aaron: That is very true. I like it. Thanks for that. Thanks for that point. So how many children do you have?
Daphne: I have one son. He is now 32. I had, he is end result of a part of my adversity too. I had five miscarriage before I gave birth to him. And now, my baby is 32. Everything is just like it is yesterday. He said to me a couple of years ago, ho, I can be like you because you miss goodie too shoe. And I turn eye up him a little and then said, I come by into that. I have to keep living my life so I can be an example for him. And I looked at him and I said to him, you do not need to be like me, all you need to do is to be the best you because I am not trying to be you but the only responsibility you have Geovonti I said to him, is to be the best you whatever that is, I do not know. I am just being the best me. And I tell you Aaron, I do not think I have ever shared this with anybody else but I feel so moved to share this. Years ago when my son was in middle school. I have been single for a long time, okay. And his friends came over and they were in his room and I heard them talking and he loudly said, oh, my mother do not play that, my mother do not play that, my mother do not play that. I do not think that my mother got pregnant with me, anything happens with her. And I banged on the wall of his door and said, do not be talking my business. And he shout out proudly and said, but I am not lying. And Aaron, I learned a valuable lesson from that day. Children share what they see. It is not always good, it is not always positive but they are sharing with their friends what they are experiences are. And it is tough with me because I said, had I been exposing him to male coming in and out of my life, it is the same way he would have been telling his friends about my habits. So our children look up to us in more ways than one and we always have to be reminded that the life we live as parents is not just for us, but for our children and other who are observing us.
Aaron: Definitely, definitely. So let me ask another thing. When you became a nurse and then you made a transition at some point into. And thanks for sharing that by the way. That was a cool experience about your, it is just really revealing about how much our children just, they see everything and they share it and we cannot really hide anything as much we would like to think. It is like, we were just examples in everything that we do. So it is super important to realize that. I appreciate that. I wanted to talk about, so you went from nurse, you became a nurse and at some point you had this transitionary period where you moved into this movement of really just being called to empower others and what was that transition and what led you to do that?
Daphne: Well, I went from nursing and then I went into what was called, cultural development commission and first I left bedside nursing and I went to public health which is community health nursing which allowed me to work with a diverse group of people. Mothers, sick people, hotel employees, home visits. Then I went from that, I went to cultural development commission which allowed me to help people to harness what their gifts and talents were. So you remember I mentioned that I did nursing differently? Because all of this journey Aaron, there was a void inside of me. Something was going on and I was looking to fill that void up. I did not know what it was.
Aaron: So when you were a nurse, you felt the void and just growing up. Is that you said, that there was something inside you, you felt incomplete or something?
Daphne: Remember my mom told me I was going to become a nurse. So although she died early. There was this voice inside my head saying that I had to become a nurse.
Aaron: So you did it for her mostly.
Aaron: So you did it for her in a sense.
Daphne: I do not know if I did it for her so much. Maybe to be obedient to her, yes.
Aaron: Yeah. You just felt that calling because.
Daphne: Yeah. At the time I do not know that I said but that is what I was programmed to do. I was looking on the island and everybody was going to become teachers and all of that. I was looking in that because there is somewhere inside my head, I was programmed to become a nurse and that what I was going to do. I was not going to disobey my mother I mean, girls, you do not disobey your mother. You do what you are told. I am from the old school. However, as I carried on in those path. I shared with you, before I was becoming lesser and lesser and lesser and lesser and lesser, then when I came to the United States in 1985, I started doing Mary Kaye cosmetics and advancing and I was winning cars and becoming sales director and helping to train other to excel in their business. I did not know anything about anything called coaching or anything like that. I just know people and enjoyed working with them. So it was not until the early 90s when I came to Connecticut. I, myself hired a coach to work with me because I wanted to find out how I could advance myself and he pointed out to me that I could do what he was doing after a short conversation. Then I said, what you mean? He said, well, Daphne, why aren’t you doing what I am doing? And I said, what do you mean? And he showed me the legal pad, he was collecting his note and he said, everything in here I have written is not how I can help you but what I have learned from having conversation with you that I am going to include in coaching my clients. And he says, you can use me as a sounding board. However, I am going to be honest to you. I do not see how I am going to be able to advance. I am not going to give your money back but you can brainstorm. And when he said that to me Aaron, it was not the first time that I was hearing that, so. I came and I wrote 10 letters and send them out people in different locations asking them to give me an assessment of myself. How they saw me and so on. And every last one them told me about situations that I have helped them unintentional just by telling them that they implement and it helped them. So after that happened, I went to a weekend treat. I do not know if you are familiar with the disc. Right? So I went into this retreat.
Aaron: It is a profiling thing that tells you your personality, traits and everything. Yup.
Daphne: Oh yeah. I went to this event from Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Three days. And then, when I fill out the disc, it is said that I was a motivator and I was thinking. Oh no, I was biased in filling this out. You really cannot be biased but at that time Aaron, that is what I was thinking. And I said to the lady that was facilitating the event. I said, Iris, I need me to order the computer generated one because something is wrong with this. She said, oh, it is $1.99. I say, I will take it. So I ordered it and then I got it back in the nice navy blue palm folder and when I got it back in the mail Aaron, I just flipped to the summary page quickly. It said the same thing that I got when I filled it out. And I said, dear Lord, you cannot run from who you are. However, I still was a bit doubtful with all the letters that I got back and all the feedback I got from the disc profile. It was not until I met a gentleman by the name of Miles Monroe and he introduced me to a little book called, In Pursuit of Purpose. After our conversation, he and I had over lunch at a conference. I was telling him about the void and turmoil that was going on in my life and he said, simple, you are not walking on your calling and your purpose and that is why. And I tell you Aaron, that little book, it is like my second Bible because it just put it out simplified. And I know that I can follow what my intuition is telling me. I can work with the Universe to manifest what I was called to do. I did not have to worry about getting other people’s approval because from the day God fertilized the egg with the sperm for me to come in here, he created me to solve a problem that nobody else can do. I do not care how many other coaches or speaker is out there, none of them is Daphne and they cannot do Daphne like I do Daphne because I was called to do something special.
Aaron: As we all were, right? As we all are. As we all need to wake up to and realize that we are, we have been given a gift. Each one of us to do whatever that is and it is up to us to find that and follow that.
Daphne: And just to embrace it because you know Aaron, I tell my clients, please do not spend time concentrating on your competition because I said, you know something, when we operate from our authenticity, the only competition we have is our past performance. And if we stay true to that, we will and grow and grow and grow and grow and grow and grow and grow because there is no competition when we focus on our authenticity, on our uniqueness.
Aaron: I love that. That is true. But it is so easy to be caught up in comparisons and like you have said, oh, I am not as good as that other coach or I am not like him and it is so natural for us. I feel that I think we both, I am sure we both felt that even after being in it, we get that temptation to be like somebody else, right?
Daphne: And that is why you have personal development is so important and I tell people all the while. Your personal development budget is supposed surpass any other budget you have in your life because unless you keep consistently, put it in the good stuff that keeps you develop. Your easily swayed by what is happening around you.
Aaron: Oh, it is so easy to get off track. So easy to forget. Like even once you have find your calling then you doubt it and then you start comparing yourself again and it is like, you got to remember daily. I am about the release this course on remembering who you are and like the importance of daily, centering yourself on who you truly are so that you do not go off course, judging and comparing and all that other stuff, right?
Daphne: And the other thing too, focusing on your why. You see, once you have your why, do not path. Ain’t nothing is going to [inaudible] you. Because, let me tell you Aaron, there are some people wake up every day and their only focus is to derail you and I off the path. They spend so much time trying to stop you from what you are doing and your purpose is lying dormant there.
Aaron: Yeah. But there is just a case in point on that. I am trying to launch this product and my website gets hacked and redirecting people to porn sites. It is like, everything.
Daphne: [Inaudible] is a liar.
Aaron: I mean it is like so I have to deal with that, this obstacle to overcome but the fact is, I am not going to stop doing the thing because I know what I am doing and it is going to hop over and get over that obstacle but like you were saying, unless you have that why. Unless you are really clear on why you are doing it, obstacles like that can shut you down and it can really stop you from you progress right?
Daphne: And you need to surround your people, surround yourself with people who will continuously ignite your passion. People that will always let you stretch, those will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. Because people often times look at Tiger Woods and say, oh, look at Tiger Woods, he is so good. Listen, Tiger pay his dues. He surround himself with the best coaches and he practiced and practiced and he honed in his craft. And that is the same thing with coaches and speakers and hosts. They think because they are doing that for people. The do not need to get the same kind of service for themselves but you are only as good as the information you are ingesting. If you are working with people and you think, I have got it together, I do not need a coach, I do not need a mentor, you are wrong. Because Aaron, it does not matter how good of eyesight you have, you cannot see the picture if you are in the frame. You got to step out of it so you can really view the beauty of that thing and it is the same thing with our work that we do. We cannot coach ourselves, we cannot mentor ourselves, we have to allow others who have gone the path who are greater than we are at this moment in order to guide and to lead us. If you are in a surrounding and you are the only smart one, it is time that you get a new gathering because you have outgrown that group.
Aaron: It is time to change. I love what you are talking about. I love hearing your story about finding that purpose and what that did for you as we talked about circling back to the beginning. You just radiating this happiness thrill to be alive. Well, nothing could really get you down. It reminds me of that song that is going around right now a lot called Happy and it is like, I see that in you where you were just like, nothing is going to get me down because I am happy and I know why I am doing what I am doing, right?
Daphne: Yes. And when the adversity hits Aaron, because in Jamaica, we have a saying that, the higher the monkey climb, the more he exposes. And what that means is the higher you go in life, the more stronger and rigid the adversities are going to be. And I have just learned to take deep breaths and look at the Lord, there is a lesson here to learn. What is the lesson? I jot it in my journal and then I close the journal and then I continue. I am still alive. I am enjoying the oxygen and I am enjoying life.
Aaron: I love it.
Daphne: One of the things that I used to do a lot too during the days when I was working in myself in the beginning, I used to be running into folks and sharing everything with them and that is a big mistake because when you shared with people who do not have your consciousness, oh my heavens, they raid on your parade and make you feel badly about everything on what is happening. So you have got to be careful.
Aaron: Yup. When you said that book, the “In Pursuit of Happiness”. Is that by Miles Monroe? That was the author?
Daphne: By Miles Monroe. Yes. The little one. He is sitting with, he has this [inaudible] on his chin like that, the little black book. Yeah. I tell you, I love that little book. My place of worship Aaron, I used to use it as small group training that I would use to help other people to pursue their calling. Yup.
Aaron: Yeah. That looks cool. I would have to look into that. Thanks for sharing that. Well, let us wrap up for today. It has been such a great conversation. I’d love hearing your stories. I’d love hearing…
Daphne: Thank you.
Aaron: You talked about your insights and finding purpose and the importance of that in happiness and in, there are so many things that you have mentioned that are so valuable and need to continue and develop ourselves. How important that is. I mean, that is just a lot of good nuggets. Well, thank you so much coming on. It has been a…
Daphne: Thank you so much for having me and continued success for what you are doing and whenever you think I could add value, I am here for you my brother.
Aaron: Yeah. I appreciate that. Is there any final. Well, first of all. Is there a place where people could, or get to know you better or reach out to you if they want to look into your coaching before anything else before we drop off the line?
Daphne: Yes. My website is daphneclarkehudsonempowers.com and I am on LinkedIn as Daphne Clarke Hudson. I am on Tweeter at Dynamic Daphne. On Facebook at Dynamic Daphne as well and if they simple, Google me, Daphne Clarke Hudson. It is Clarke with and E. They will see all the things that I am up to. I have a radio show on Blog Talk Radio regularly Wednesday mornings 10:00 Eastern Daylight Time and Sundays, 7 PM Eastern Time as well. So I am all over, they are looking to add value to other people, looking for joint ventures on collaboration and all that good stuff.
Aaron: Yeah. That is awesome. I am going to post all these on the website as well so people can have links to your website directly with all the correct spelling and everything and all of your contact information. So everybody listening, you can go over there and again, thank you so much. Is there any final piece of wisdom that you want to impart on us on people for what the can do to live a truly amazing life?
Daphne: Follow your heart. Take quiet time. Be still and listen. Listen to you heart because that is your authentic true self. Do not misjudge it. It will never misguide you. It is authentic. It is unique and you just need to follow and obey because, so long as you do that, you will always be ahead of your game. So just follow and listen to your heart.
Aaron: Beautiful. Thank you so much Daphne. And with that, we will let everybody go. Thanks again and have a fantastic day.
Daphne: Thank you so much Aaron and you stay blessed.
Aaron: Okay. Thanks.