“My grip on life is coming unraveled, again.”
“When will I get it together!”
Can you relate to any of that?
I certainly can.
I got this heartfelt thought from 5MMM member Kathy this week after a message about the importance of embracing failure…and I want to share my response with you:
Wow, every month I seems to be in line to what you are talking about. I am doing a lot of failing lately.
I told you last month that I was inspired to begin my level 200 yoga course and found that I just didn’t have the time it required to do it well, so I quit.
I was beating myself up about it and now trying to chalk it up to another failure that I can learn by.
But, having a hard time accepting that and taking it to mean it is something about me that is flawed.
Also, I am failing at following through with the all day energy diet.
I just feel so overwhelmed with life that I can’t follow through with anything.
I am still meditating and doing my yoga every day, but my grip on life is coming unraveled, again.
When will I get it together!
Thanks for listening,
First of all…you are definitely NOT flawed.
There’s no ‘reject pile’ for human creations.
There’s not a single person who got ‘messed up’ in manufacturing and really just isn’t right.
We all have our own unique strengths and weaknesses.
And it’s all quite perfect actually.
Diet can be hard…even when it seems easy.
I have a challenge sticking to my healthy diet often too, even with lots of pain in my memory as a STRONG motivator.
I have felt the pain of self-loathing over that too.
And boy oh boy can I ever relate to feeling overwhelmed and wondering when I’ll ‘get it together’!
What helps me most is remembering that I don’t actually need ‘get it together’ once and for all – and that’s not actually possible!
This life is meant for continual learning and growth.
Sure sometimes we get frustrated when we fall back into the same rut or pattern (for the 25th time sometimes in my case;).
Yes – it is possible to move beyond some of our less desirable habits and patterns permanently.
But whatever we are experiencing right now is already here, so we may as well accept it.
There’s no benefit to wishing it weren’t here, or wishing we were somehow different already.
We can’t change what happened and as long as we are resisting what is it is more challenging to move beyond it.
You are perfectly lovable just how you are.
Accepting that and forgiving yourself can release a big burden.
Every time I feel my grip coming unraveled – my foundational daily practices (the 12 habits of a truly amazing life) are successful 100% of the time at reconnecting me with joy.
So I always go back to them.
You know…Meditate, Write, Affirm, Move, Appreciate, Serve, etc.
The fundamentals are always there, just waiting to be focused on.
And they can always get you feeling more centered.
And I just yesterday finished this new poster which lists all 12 habits as a motivating reminder.
It’s called the “Make Today Amazing” poster because those 12 things are proven tactics in doing just that.
Just put any one or all of them to the test for yourself and you will see.
Each of those habits corresponds to one of the 12 pillars as shown on the original ‘Truly Amazing Life’ Poster.
(Here’s the download link for the TAL poster)
Together these two posters form an exact roadmap and reminder of what we can DO to make today amazing.
The way to live a truly amazing life is to make today amazing.
It’s beautifully simple.
No need to worry about tomorrow.
Last week I neglected my morning routine for most of the week…getting caught up in my projects. By the end, I felt exactly like Kathy described.
I had starved myself all week and the result was I felt really down and overwhelmed.
It’s easy to neglect ourselves because it feels minor in the moment, but it can stop us in our tracks – like hitting a brick wall – when self-neglect mounts up enough.
To refuel my soul I ended up driving up the canyon for an evening and building a fire – just me, my guitar, and my journal all alone for a while where I could sing (and cry) as loud as I wanted to.
I camped in my car, had a peaceful morning of meditation and writing and came back home rejuvenated and reconnected with my inner joy.
It doesn’t need to be that drastic though – life’s a lot smoother when the morning practices are done each day – rather than starving for days at a time.
We live and learn.
(Even if we have to re-learn the same lesson 20 times.)
But when we set our expectation’s on ourselves too high we set ourselves up for sadness and despair.
Be kind to yourself…you deserve it.
You don’t have to be perfectly checking off every box in order to be happy. Diet, Exercise, Morning Routines, etc…they are all tools to help us.
Try not to allow the tools to become the depressors by getting too attached to them.
Every time you fall down you can get back up.
We’ll be falling our entire lives hopefully…if not, that means we’re not trying, growing or expanding.
So feel free to let go of the need to ‘get it together’, I think you’ll find that freeing.
Make today amazing!
P.P.S – I’d love to hear what you think about the new ‘Make Today Amazing’ Poster. I realize that you probably need clarification on many of the habits – there’s a lot more detail to each habit than can fit on one poster – it’s just meant as a high level reminder.