“I Give myself away freely”
The words “door mat” and being taken for granted keep plaguing my mind!
I did this for so many years and it had angered me, that despite my will to do this and
When you see so obviously how others take you and everything you give “freely” it doesn’t make for truly amazing living!
I am trying so hard to make all these my affirmations Aaron but I am stumbling!
How do I rectify this and justify this to enable me to truly believe and trust? I can visualize the majority of all this but I need serious help with this one. Half way through now and I don’t want to lose my momentum!
This is from 5 Minute Mental Mastery subscriber Sam. (If you’re not familiar with 5MMMM you can go here for more info)
Thanks for the question Sam!
Makes me wonder how many others struggle with certain affirmations, and brings up a really good point!
Notice the struggles above…
“I am stumbling”
“how do I justify this to truly believe?”
There are a couple things going on here…
1 – When I personally say ‘I give myself away freely’ what that means to me is ‘openly’, ‘without reserve’, ‘without holding back’. Just want to clarify that…doesn’t mean I don’t ever charge ‘money’ for valuable services rendered when I share my gifts…just in case that is unclear to some.
2 – There are beliefs embedded deeply here like “when I give of myself I am always taken for granted” or “when I give and don’t receive something in return I feel like a door mat”
Notice how it is VERY DIFFICULT and you are ‘trying so hard’ to believe but are stumbling.
Who else feels that way??
(Hint: All of us at times!)
The struggle always appears when our subconscious beliefs oppose a new belief we are trying to install, or a new direction we are trying to take.
That is the internal resistance rearing its head.
It will always be a struggle as long as you subconsciously believe those opposite things.
So here are two suggestions:
1 – Be easy on yourself. If you really have to fight to believe one of ‘my’ affirmations, perhaps let that go for now, and focus on those things that you CAN believe.
Just put that affirmation aside for now, and recognize that it’s a struggle simply because of opposing internal beliefs.
Give yourself space and time to work through it, and keep moving forward with others.
2 – When you’re ready, calm, and once you start to recognize those beliefs that are limiting you such as “when I give and don’t receive I feel like a door mat, taken for granted and abused”, then start to question that belief and bring light to it.
Use the 4 questions as taught in the work by Byron Katie:
1 – Is it true? (if no, move to 3)
2 – Can I absolutely know that it’s true?
3 – How do you react, what happens when you believe that thought?
4 – Who would you be without that thought?
Once you answer those in detail, Turn the thought (initial limiting belief) around to its opposite and find 3 specific examples of how the opposite is true.
An example of turning the thought around:
When I give and don’t receive anything in return I feel amazing because giving is truly living and giving with no expectation of anything in return gives me freedom.
When I give with no expectation I am planting seeds of good in the universe that will someday blossom and return fruit.
Now think of 2 or 3 specific examples when one of those two beliefs is true.
Now once you can see that the opposite can also be true, you don’t have to hold on to that other belief and it can release its grip on you.
Question your beliefs!
Just because you believe something doesn’t mean it’s true.
And even if it is true, that doesn’t mean you have to keep holding on to it.
How is it benefiting you?
I’ll leave you with that for today…
Make today Amazing!